"Children Learn What They Live"

A poem, more commonly known as the "If" poem was written by Dorothy Nolte in 1954. It's included on this website as a sort of immunisation and an aspiration asking parents to do their best to avoid handing on misery as in the other famous poem on being a parent.

3/1/20251 min read

group of women standing on green grass field during daytime
group of women standing on green grass field during daytime

If a child lives with criticism

She learns to condemn

If a child lives with hostility

She learns to fight

If a child lives with ridicule

She learns to be shy

If a child lives with shame

She learns to feel guilt

If a child lives with tolerance

She learns to be patient

If a child lives with praise

She learns to appreciate

If a child lives with fairness

She learns to be just

If a child lives with security

She learns to have faith

If a child lives with approval

She learns to like herself

If a child lives with acceptance

She learns to find love in the world

If a child lives with criticism

He learns to condemn

If a child lives with hostility

He learns to fight

If a child lives with ridicule

He learns to be shy

If a child lives with shame

He learns to feel guilt

If a child lives with tolerance

He learns to be patient

If a child lives with praise

He learns to appreciate

If a child lives with fairness

He learns to be just

If a child lives with security

He learns to have faith

If a child lives with approval

He learns to like himself

If a child lives with acceptance

He learns to find love in the world